- At Curtis Park, you're frequently approached for money. At Wash Park, you're frequently approached to sign some petition that is so important the future of the free world depends on your signature.
- At Curtis Park, people are pulling aluminum cans out of dumpsters. At Wash Park, they're just putting them in.
- At Curtis Park, people walk out in front of cars and bikes because they're high as a kite. At Wash Park, people walk out in front of cars and bikes because they are narcissistic and/or on a cell phone.
- At Curtis Park, you risk getting taken out by an off-leash Chihuahua running free. At Wash Park, you risk getting taken out by a puggle on a poorly-managed retractable dog leash.
- At Curtis Park, you see dogs where a desirable breed was accidentally crossed with a less desirable one. At Wash Park, you see dogs where a desirable breed was intentionally crossed with a less desirable one.
- At Curtis Park, you can get some of Denver's best Mexican food at the Creamery. At Wash Park, you are approximately 10 miles by the crow flies from any respectable Mexican food.
- At Curtis Park, people will consume anything they can get their hands on. At Wash Park, people will eat anything, as long as it is organic, free-range, cage-, gluten-, and high-fructose corn syrup-free, or is called "Fat Tire".
- At Curtis Park, people smoke because the cops have more important issues to deal with. At Wash Park, people smoke because their wife won't allow them to smoke in their half-mill bungalow.
- At Curtis Park, people sleep outside because they're homeless. At Wash Park, people sleep outside to protest Wall Street.
- At Curtis Park, you deal with annoying lines of geese that act like they own the park. At Wash Park, you deal with annoying paceline of cyclists that act the same.
- At Curtis Park, if the police show up, you know someone got shot or shanked. At Wash Park, if the police show up, you know a game of cornhole must have gone terribly wrong.
- At Curtis Park, if you see an ambulance, again you know someone got shot or shanked. At Wash Park, if you see an ambulance, you know someone overindulged on vodka and Red Bull.
- At Curtis Park, the people are incredibly naive about government and politics because they don't know any better. At Wash Park, the people are incredibly naive about government and politics because they are entitled.
Thanks for reading.
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